An Ocean of Emotion

Hi Friends!
So in the last Blog I left you I mentioned that I was home, my wonderful home of Lynchburg, Va. (siiiiiiiigh)
Oh I missed it dreadfully!
Being home for those two weeks was actually bittersweet. I had a lot going on emotionally. At first it wasn't bad at all. I was excited to see my family and friends and to sleep in my own bed. Just about everyday of those two weeks was packed full with something to do. I had lots of Father-Daughter time with my Dad. When I wasn't hanging with my Dad I was with my Gills. During the week I went rollerblading, saw some friends that were in town (Rebekah and Cody), had sleepovers with the Gills, breakfast downtown a couple times (once with Rebekah and Micah and then with Rachel Rogers), spent the afternoon with Grandma, saw Liberty's dance rehearsal for OKLAHOMA, Chic-fila with Ray, Zumba and a slumber party with Courtney, went to my church a couple times (Thomas Road Baptist, I really missed it) hung out with Alan, went Bridesmaid dress shopping with Micah, Starbucks with Brently, went to Richmond with Dad, more Gill time at the Apt, The Muse, pillow fights, saw Wolfbanes production of "The Tempest", sat in on a Mr. Brasher Class, had La Carretta with some Gills, had Panera and went shopping with Sarah, a date or two, pillow talks with Allison (I love those), dancing, frolicing in fields/fountains and enough Sweet Frog to last me until December.

Woo! I'm tired all over again. As you can see I had a lot of fun and I'm sure I missed a few things. So naturally towards the end of my vacation I started to feel a little down because I would be leaving all of this behind. Yes I'd be molding the children of the world but STILL. On top of that, I'm not gonna go into a lot of detail because it's very personal but the whole time I was home, someone who I still deeply care for was giving me this "I want to be with you." "No I don't." "Yes I do." "I need space." dance EVERY day. I know what your thinking. However, it's extremely complicated because I'm on the road and he's still trying to get his Theatre degree. I'm confused about the whole thing. My Gills tell me one thing but my Heart says another. Like I said this is extremely private and complicated so I'm not going to explain any more than that. Readers just know my heart has never felt more torn.

The last few days I was home I had so much fun but yet I found myself still very sad because I knew I would be leaving soon. I was going through an ocean of emotion. The night before my last day in Lynchburg I cried myself to sleep about leaving, woke up, and cried again. Then I thought, "Ok today is a new day! Get up!". I went and got some Special K cereal (my fav) and was like "I'm gonna go find on the map hanging in my room of where I'm going and put pins in it. Yea! This is gonna be good!". Once I found every destination I was stoked. I was like "Yea this fall tour is going to rock!". Then I looked at Washington State, then Virginia, then Washington, saw how far Virginia was from Washington and started crying again. This was my last day in Lynchburg and I just then realized how far away Washington was from Virginia. Haha I was a mess! I spent the last day with my Dad just hanging out at the house and talking. I love him. Then later that night I met up with some friends for some late night Sweet Frog. On the way home and that night as I went to bed I cried again. :(

I woke up the next morning with my bags packed and waited for Grandma to show up so we could all go to the airport. The ride to Roanoke wasn't bad, I just tried not to think about it. My Dad and I always have this tradition of getting breakfast at Chic-fila before we go get on a plane to Florida or wherever we're going so I got my last Chic-fila meal for awhile. They don't have them in Washington. I'm going to miss their Lemonade. It's the "Nectar of the gods". Then we said our "Goodbyes" and yep you guessed it, I started crying. When I got on the plane I was right next to the front door and it took EVERYTHING for me not to jump off the plane or have them turn it around. There I was crying and I'm sure the Steward guy was thinking, "What's the matta with her!". Poor thing, he just didn't know. I guess I should've said "Bomb" they might've stopped the plane then. Hahah!

When I arrived in Spokane, Wa, Loretta's friend David picked me up and we met up with Loretta and her boyfriend Cole. Those last few days in Lynchburg I'm going to admit were extremely rough on a little Gill's heart but I woke up in Couer de Lane, Id the next morning ready for Fall Tour and I thought, "Today is a new day.". :)
-Jen